Milo Canopener (June 1, 2011)

• Format: Journal/Newspaper
• Language: English
• Published: Milo Community Volunteers 2011
• Subjects: Milo (Alta.) > Newsletters; Alta; Fairbanks; Canada; Argentina; Curl; Kay; Kane; Myers; Pancake; Orleans; Laurie; Colleen; Cabot; Denise; Buttons; Rowe; Garry; Saloon; Hurd; Archer; Marquis; Corral; Eternity; Wilbur; Hidden Valley; The Buttons; Hell Gate; Vaccaro; Ridley; Slave Lake
• Online Access: http://digitallibrary.uleth.ca/cdm/ref/collection/sanl/id/42

An archive of the Milo Canopener. The University of Lethbridge Library received permission from the Archives at Milo Library to digitize and display this content. MILO CANOPENER Milo Can Opener Canada PostAgmt. # 40607518 Box 12, Miio, AB T0L1L0 MILO LIBRARY N/C June 2011 Edition no. 253► Milo Canopener Published by Volunteer Staff Layout Editors: Production: Subscriptions: Cartoons / “Kids Say” Notices Barb Godkin 485-8389,599-2213 Colleen Bartsch 599-2204 Darlene Phillips 599-3791 Betty Armstrong Darlene Phillips 599-3791 Marina Vannatta 381-6389 Any Canopener volunteer Advertising: $ 5.00 $ 6.00 $ 8.00 $ 15.00 $ 2.00 [Single Insertion] Business Directory Quarter Page Half Page Full Page Classified Ads Free Items: Event Notices Announcements: Wedding, Anniversary', Births, Showers, etc. Cards of Thanks News Items Articles of Interest Editorial Content: Letters to the Editor are welcome. All submissions must be signed. Letters will not be printed unless signed, and requests to remain anonymous will not be honoured. Deadlines: The deadline for photo-ready ad copy or articles is about a week before the end of the month. Please allow additional layout time for unformatted copy. The Canopener is usually printed on the last Thursday of the month. Subscription Rates: Single Copy ‘"Cover' Inside Milo [pickup, Outside Milo [mailed] ' Price $ 2.00 delivery7 or mailedj $ 16.00 S 24.00 How to reach us: Email is our preferred method of contact if possible as photo-ready advertising copy or content can be printed clearly. Fax transmissions are low resolution, and tend to be unclear. Thanks! Email: [e-mail] [e-mail] Regular Mail: Milo Canopener P.0 Box 12 Milo Alberta T0L 1L0 Fax: [phone] [Milo Library) Drop off: Items may be left. At Milo Green Foods in the Canopener box at the back of the store. At the Milo Library. In the Library Book Drop. ♦GOODS & SERVICES MILO CAFE CHINESE &. WESTERN TAKE OUT ORDERS 599-3832 Closed Monday Monday-Sundav.8:30 am - 8.-00 pm if1 < -jut i/'< XU1S Box 7 Doug Marks Office: [phone] Milo, AB president rax: [phone] TOL 1LO Mobile: [phone] Marks Oilfield Services Inc, 11 IWrJyS Trucking, Gravel id Ld Oilfield Maintenance and Construction Pipelining Allan V ' CATERING/SERVICE and Colleen Bartsch MILO, Alla, phone. [phone] Ww Deitz Investment Services Corp. A Member of the Deitz Group of Companies Suite 700, One Executive Place 1816 Crowchild Trail NW Ron Deitz Calgary, AB. T2M 3Y7 President Phone: [phone] Investing for your Future fax: [phone] Toll-Free: 1-800-661-2817 Email: [e-mail] in . . . ^LMARy KAy. Donna Benneft Deitr Independent Beauty Consultant P.O. Box 37, Milo, Alta. TOL 110 [phone] ■- . Donna Bennett Deitz Direct: [phone] Account Manager Small Business donna■[e-mail] Marianne Armstrong Direct: [phone] Personal Banking Officer marianne.armstrong@seotiabankcom : Melissa Rooke Inquiries: [phone] Officer in Charge [e-mail] PO Box 150 Milo, AB TOL 1L0 § Scotiabank . Phillips Agricultural Products agS J and Services lllmlllml Box292 * ■UbUJ vmJ Lomond, Alberta TOL 1G0 Telephone: [phone] Toll Free: 1-800-387-8486 D . . . Cellular: [phone] Robert Phillips far [phone] 1-800-582-7054 jj “Make Your Winning Move With Us” MLS Magnuson Realty | LYLE MAGNUSON LARRY DIETRICH Website: www.ma2nusonrealtv.com 1 _________]We would like to thank our advertisers for their continued support. Without them, we would not be able to print this newsletter for the enjoyment of the readers, TOWING *4X4 Service * Wheel-Lift * Boosting * Winching * Fuel, Fiats * Lock-outs * Recoveries * R.V. Towing * Small Repairs £ Services Bus: 485-2667 Mobile: [phone] ' 24 Hour Emergency Service" Ready & Reliable [phone joe] VACUUM * Septic Tanks * Portables * Mud Pits * Sumps * Holding Tanks * Cisterns * Basement Floods Box 93 Vulcan Alta. TOL 2B0 Business Card Ads $60 /year includes your subscription See back of cover for details Also offering portable Welding Services *$$$&%**■ — ■ —r- : ZODIAC TR Bus. [phone] Cel. [phone] Fax. [phone] Res. [phone] A R.R. #1 Milo, AB TOL 1L0 / '* Sunflower Studio Pedicures, manicures, polish & nail art TRACY MOZILL 238 River St Hidden Valley Resort - Cluny, AB TOJ 0S0 Phone [phone] Email: [e-mail] Welding Aluminum B-Pressure Service Truck i RIG-UPS Truckdecks TRAILERS - ETC. Shaun Umscheid £sso VULCAN VILLAGE GAS BAJ P.O. BOX 425 VULCAN. ALTA. TOL 200 PHONE: [phone] MILO SEED CLEANING ASSOCIATION LTD. 599-2150 Cleaner Seed is Sown, Cleaner Crops are Grown. Sheldon Walker Manager GRANT, KRYSTALOWICH & BENNETT FOOD TO CO Garry & Bernardine Nelson 485-2519 CERTIFIED GENERAL ACCOUNTANTS FULL ACCOUNTING SERVICES AND CONSULTING P.O. Box 239 Vulcan, Alberta TOL 2B0 Phone: [phone]I RICHARDSON CMP Lori Vooys, cm, fcsi, FMA Vice President Wealth Advisor The Stevenson Vooys Croup Richardson GMP Limited 333 7th Avenue South West Suite 1000 Calgary, Alberta T2P 2Z1 Branch: 1 [phone] Email: [e-mail] www.RichardsonGMP.com Dir.: [phone] Fax: [phone] __ Vulcan Optometric Clinic (Dr. (8. L. Trump Optometrist Open Wednesday and Friday 8:00 a.m. - 3:00 p.m. BOX 972 VULCAN,ALBERTA TOL 2B0 l FAIRBANKS DENTURE CLINIC 125 Centre Street, Vulcan, Alberta TOL 2B0 403=485=2368 Scott D. Fairbanks, DD Office Hours: day 9:00 am - 5:00 pm Friday 9:00 am -12:30 pm TELEPHONE [phone] (EMERGENCIES ONLY 485-2886) ___'________!_________ 'V _______ Liscombe Chiropractic Clinic DR. GEORGE LISCOMBE NANTON [phone] VULCAN [phone] F.M. TRAILER WORLD Dealers For Norbert, Rainbow, Dex & Duralite Aluminum Stock, Horse & Flatdeck Trailers Selling Fence Posts & Corral Panels — Truckload Discounts Available Check Our Website For New & Used www.fmtrailerworld.com Vulcan [phone] Strathmore [phone] Stavely 1-877-205-1999What Canadians Have to be Proud of? 1, Smarties (not sold in the USA) 2. Crispy Crunch, Coffee Crisp (not sold in the USA) 3. The size of our footballs fields, one less down, and bigger balls. 4. Baseball is Canadian - 1st game - June 4, 1838 - Ingersoll, ON. 5. Lacrosse is Canadian 6. Hockey is Canadian 7. Basketball is Canadian 8. Apple pie is Canadian 9. Mr. Dress-up beats Mr. Rogers 10. Tim Hortons beats Dunkin' Donuts 11. Canada has the largest French population that never surrendered 12. Our civil war was fought in a bar and lasted a little over an hour. 13. A Canadian invented Standard Time. 14. The Hudson’s Bay Company once owned over 10% of the earth's surface and is still around as the world's oldest company. 15. The average dog sled team can kill and devour a full grown human in under 3 minutes. (That's more information than I need!) 16. We invented ski-doos, jet-skis, Velcro, zippers, insulin, penicillin and the telephone. Also short wave radios which save countless lives each year. 17. A Canadian invented Superman. 18. We have colored money. 19. Our beer advertisements kick butt! (Incidentally. so does our beer) to Germany. BUT MOST IMPORTANT! The handles on our beer cases are big enough to fit your hands in with mitts on. OOOoohhhhh.Canada !! Oh yeah. And our elections only take one day!Canada Day Pancake Breakfast ) pancake Time: 8:00 am -10:00 am Place: Milo Community Hall Admission: non-perishable item(s) for the Food Bank Free gifts for the kids! Bring your family to celebrate Canada Day with the Milo Lions Club. Date: July 1, 2011Update from your Milo Community Sustainability Group The following are my personal views and opinions that may not necessarily reflect those of the others who are working towards the objectives of our group. Due to conflicting responses from Municipal Affairs, our group has had a very difficult time attempting to work with County Council. The Council is worried that our avenue for funding may not be legal and desires to get a clear directive on this matter from Municipal Affairs. The information that the County has received from Municipal Affairs seems to indicate that our proposed avenue of funding is "unlikely to fall under the scope of recreational services". This conflicts with our own response from Municipal Affairs that our proposal is "brilliant," that "when they [the Milo Recreation Board] get the tax money they can do with it what they want." We feel that we should be cooperatively working and sharing information with the County Council and Municipal Affairs. Unfortunately, this has not been the case with the County. We have had phone calls not returned, we were dropped from the council meeting agenda and, until last week, there was no sharing of correspondence— even now only partially. That said, being that we hope poor communication and tenuous cooperation is a thing of the past, we have had good support from a few Councilors and are grateful for their efforts to further our interests! The County Council has taken the proactive measure of initiating a Reeve's Task Force in which they would like us to participate. I will and I am sure that our group will participate to the best of our ability so that our 3 proposals can be fulfilled and at a sustained rate of progress. With this offer of a task force, there seems to be a misconception as to what our project entails and how we propose to fund it. The Council feels that the monies will come from "County coffers, something we have never proposed. What we did propose was to fund the bursary and building incentives of our proposal with monies collected solely from our recreation area. Yes, there will likely have to be some funding from the County for infrastructure requirements regarding lake development. This is no different than the funding for the Vulcan/Champion/Carmangay water line or the County building a new campground. We were invited to make a presentation to the Palliser School Board, last week and our initiatives were very well received. The Board had CTV from Lethbridge attend, so we could again attempt to further our objectives in an interview. We also did an interview with the Vulcan Advocate and it appears we will be having the Lethbridge Herald doing an article as well. Our incentives, if they would attract families and businesses to Milo, would not only keep what we have as a community viable but may provide employment opportunities. Ultimately if our proposals reach fruition in a timely manner, everyone within our district and within the County as a whole will benefit from a growing economy and an increased tax base. I believe that as oil field taxes decline within Vulcan County, we as landowners need to have this decline in tax revenue offset by a more diversified tax base. I believe that we have over the next number of years that ability to increase Vulcan County's tax base to over 40 %. So where are we? First, it appears that in order to pursue funding our proposal through our municipalrecreation board we will need Provincial Legislative change to the Municipal Government Act, change that will allow us to have the ability to tax ourselves to raise the monies for the economic incentives to grow our community. This process, we are told, will take approximately 18 months. We are moving forward in this regard. The Lake McGregor development part of our proposal has to have more detail and input from each of you. Again there is a small window of opportunity with 2% of irrigation district water allocation been allowed for "other uses". Considering that water usage or the perceived lack of water is dominating public policy and in that regard the Provincial Land Use Framework for the South Saskatchewan River Basin will be released in the next few months. I believe that we should be bold and initiate a game plan to take advantage of these opportunities before someone else acquires the water or we run into a more constrictive legislated regime for water use. It appears to me that if we push forward this summer, we may be able to have some positive gains on all fronts by fall with implementation possibly 2 to 3 years away. The question arises as to what else we can do in the interim as a community? If we face once again a cut back on the enrolment in our school in 2013/14, how do we attract families to our community in the short term as we wait for Legislative change? Is there a better way that we as a community can exercise self-government and fund this proposal voluntarily? We are also going to have another community meeting at 7:00 pm on Thursday, June 23, 2011 at the Milo Hall to discuss the following: 1. review what we have done to date; 2. revisit our 3 proposals; 3. address some of your concerns that have come our way and how the suggested programs that were outlined back in March 16th can be amended; 4. have more community input on the Lake McGregor Lake proposal; 5. and elect a board of directors to see these initiatives enacted. I would like to thank all of those who have attended our meetings, to those that travelled to the Vulcan County Council meeting last week, and to Grant Lahd for saying w'nal he did in support! 1 truly appreciate your comments, suggestions, and constructive criticism. Regards, Michael Monner 599-3790 iMAge. SALON | I fjnisex C.uts, dolors, Perms, Waxing, CJpdos and p>row | inting All Stylists trained in Paul Mitchell color and cutting techniques C-ALL U)cnise £)rown 5dl~l 129 j [\jorma £)rown ! QjAncc Maynard Paring this ad in for 1 5% off your next chemical service ( valid for one time use per customer) Located at the Country Farmhouse call: 734-2593SUHiMBB siiissfc’si — Builders and Shakers Vulcan County - n • Vulcan Innovation Protect i ■ ill V I i:bi ■ =j ^ ■| ■ B ' •; fyi\ Mill. lf||55U Lethbridge College and Vulcan innovation Project are calling all Tradesman, Suppliers and Developers Canada’s Largest Wind Energy Project Along with Other Development Opportunities are Coming to Vulcan County Now is an exciting time to be part of the construction and development pro­jects in Vulcan County. This is your opportunity to meet with other local businesses to talk about what these and other projects mean to you and your businesses. Bring your business cards—a great chance to network with others Don’t have experience? Come learn about the training programs available through our partnership with Lethbridge College. For more details on this opportunity contact Vulcan Innovation Project: , , . - . 403-485-4147 [e-mail] Information Session to take place June 14th, 2011 Located at the Champion Hall 7:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. Refreshments provided Take a picture of this 2D bar code with your smartphone code scanning app or visit www.vulcaninnovation.com mm | Vulcan innovation Project incias support ^ Rural Alberta Development Fund 100s Yuleazu Business O'-evelofisueMf SocietyT’s Saloon/ Milo Hotel Live Music: ANDiHtKUit Saturday, June 25 7:00 p.m. Don’t forget Beach Volleyball Tourney July 15, 16 & 17 Cabaret Saturday Night with live music! Wing Wednesdays 7 p.m. to midnightVILLAGE OF MILO ** Village Office Hours ** OPEN Wednesdays - 9 am to 4 pm Payments or correspondence may be dropped off using the mail slot in the Office door. Village Post Office Monday through Friday, 9 am to 4 pm. !!!!! PLEASE NOTE CHANGES TO JUNE 2011 HOURS OF SERVICE !!!!!! Contact the Village at PHONE: [phone] FAX: [phone] [e-mail] MAYOR --- RAFAEL ZEA COUNCILLORS --- LAURIE DUFFIELD _______________________ KATIE WALKER INTERIM ADMINISTRATOR --- GINGER DEITZ POST OFFICE --- DENISE MYERS VILLAGE FOREMAN --- LOUIS MYERS MAY 2011 MEETING HIGHLIGHTS Cao Transitioning Council approved contracting Ginger Deitz to provide Interim CAO services for the Village while they actively move forward with recruiting a new Chief Administrative Officer. Jan Loree Hurl resigned from this position effective May 13, 2011. Post Office Clerk Denise Myers has been hired as the new full time Post Office Clerk for the Milo Post Office. Twyla Thompson will be leaving this position on May 27, 2011. 2011 Budget The Village of Milo’s 2011 Budget was approved by Council and may be viewed at the Village Office during regular office hours. Village Office Sewer Repair The Village Office’s damaged sewer line will be repaired by Thuro on May 18th and 19®' which was great news for the staff! Thanks so much to the businesses on Centre Street for providing washroom facilities and access to water while this repair was being affected! By Law #367 By Law #367 “Procedures and Committees” was given 3rd and final reading and passed into effect on May 16, 2011. By Law #370 Council will address By Law #370 “2011 Taxation Rates” at a Special Meeting of Council on May 27lh, 2011 in the Village Office. The combination Assessment and Taxation notice will go out to residents and businesses by mid June 2011. By Law #371 Council gave 1st reading to By Law #371 “Establishment of a Regional Assessment Review Board”. The Oldman River Regional Services Commission is offering a new regional approach to assessment complaints and appeals that they hope will enable them to create a more understandable, effective and accessible assessment review service for everyone. Safety Codes Service Municipal Affairs has cancelled the accreditation of the current supplier of Milo’s safety codes services, Innovative Inspection Agency Inc. As a result, the Village has entered into agreement with Superior Safety Codes Inc. to provide transitional safety codes services for Milo to bridge the gap until the new Administrator and Council have had time to research the available options for long term service provision. Councillor Code of Conduct Mayor Zea reviewed with Council By Law #365 “Council Code of Conduct and Ethics and sections of the MGA pertaining to the roles and responsibilities of Council and the Chief Administrative Officer. Municipal Emergency Plan Council received the results of the Alberta Emergency Management Annual Review of the Milo Municipal Emergency Plan. The Village was applauded for bringing the Plan up todate, although there are still some areas that require modification to meet the AEMA requirements. Municipal Safety Recognition Alberta Municipal Affairs has advised Council that the Village has been awarded Award the Municipal Safety Recognition Award for 2010. Although none of the Council are able to attend, this award will be presented to Milo at the Partners’ Dinner of the Safety Codes Council on June 9, 2011. Planning Session The Council Planning Session for June will be held at 7:00 p.m. on Monday, June 6lh, 2011 in the Village Office. June Meeting The Regular Council Meeting for June will be held at 7:00 pm on Monday. June 20th, 2011 in the MILO LIBRARY Lower Level. To book as a delegate, please send your request in writing, with your name, phone number and brief outline of the subject to be discussed. Your submission must be received by the Village Office by 1 p.m. on Wednesday June 15, 2011 to be considered for the June 2011 Meeting. !!! IMPORTANT NOTICE !!! Please note these important adjustments to the Milo Post Office services for the month of June 2011 (ONLY). Hours of Operation:__________June 1 - 24, 2011 Mondays 9:00 a.m. - 4:00 p.m. Tuesdays 9:00 a.m. - 4:00 p.m. WEDNESDA YS 1:00 P.M. - 4:00 P.M. Thursdays 9:00 a.m. - 4:00 p.m. FRIDAYS________1:00 P.M. - 4:00 P.M. Sorting and Delivery of Mail: June 1 - 24, 2011 SORTING AND DELIVERY OF MAIL WILL NOT START UNTIL 1:00 P.M. ON WEDNESDAYS AND FRIDAYS DURING THIS PERIOD. MAIL SHOULD BE DELIVERED TO YOUR BOX BY 3:00 P.M. Outgoing Mail Service:_______June 1 - 24, 2011 There will be NO CHANGE to the current level of service you experience. Mail received in the outside Post Office Box will continue to be collected at 11:00 a.m. daily and forwarded to outgoing destinations.COUNCILLOR COMMENTARY Hello fellow citizens! Hope you're staying dry and I am hoping that these "spring showers” will bring us some “spring flowers” soon. It has been so nice to see people coming out to attend our Council meetings. I feel that it is so important for each of us to become involved and be informed about what is happening in our Village. Thank you to those of you who have been coming out. Just a reminder too that if you would like to discuss something on the agenda or bring something to the Council’s attention, please contact the CAO so that you will be named a delegate and can have your designated time to speak. Thank-you. We have been dealing with a number of changes these last few months. A number of applicants will be being interviewed this week for our CAO position. Denise Myers is our new postal clerk. We are so happy to still be able to offer this service to our Village and area as we feel it is such a valuable service to have in Milo. We ask that you please be patient during these transition times. After much discussion, our Village budget has been approved. It is available for viewing at the Village Office. The Village was presented with the Municipal Safety Recognition Award for 5 years of accredation. Thank you to all of our many volunteers who help to keep our home safe and are there when emergencies arise. The Vulcan Business Development Society held a meeting to discuss the future of the Vulcan Innovation Project (VIP). We were given a brief outline of why it began, what they set out to accomplish, and what has been done to date. There have been a number of different initiatives started. These include a partnership with Lethbridge College in order to provide College accredited courses in the County. They have also created partnerships with Endev, Digital Alberta (deal with creating websites, graphic development, gaming projects, etc.), U. of A. technology training department and Industry Canada. These partnerships have helped Vulcan to be able to provide wireless internet throughout their downtown, educational workshops dealing with technology (many of which I have attended and they have been very informative and helpful at keeping up to date in the technology world), and ways to use social media tools to increase your business sales or advertising market. They have also held Renewable Energy workshops and have staff available to help you with setting up hardware / software for your computer and getting your business onto the internet. The V.I.P. has also created a “Vulcan County History” page (www.vulcancountvhistory.com) which creates a permanent log of our history in the area. The Community events calendar (www.vulcancountvevents.com) was also created to help people become aware of what is going on in the County and also for those who are booking events to not over-book all on one night. The Marquis Foundation meetings have been cancelled for the last 2 months. The Vulcan District Waste Commission meeting was also cancelled for this month. Please see the minutes regarding the Emergency Services meeting that Raphael attended. For those in our area who are involved in the construction industry, please make sure you take a look at the poster regarding “Builders and Shakers in Vulcan County”. We are looking for input from local tradespeople regarding future developments taking place in the County. We wish to encourage these developers to use local businesses and also Lethbridge College will be there to inquire about what education opportunities they can help provide here. Please plan to attend the get-together on Tuesday, June 14th at 7 p.m. at the Champion Community Hall. Any further questions, please contact me at home 599-3763. Have a great June! With pleasure, Katie Walker Village of Milo CouncillorMILO LIONS CLUB NEWS COMING EVENTS JUNE/JULY 2011 June 1 — Supper Meeting 7:00 pm June 2 - STARS Golf Classic June 7 - Carseland Interclub June 8 - Executive Meeting 8:00 pm June 15 - Induction of New Officers Supper Meeting 7:00 pm June 22 - Executive Meeting 8:00 pm July 1 - Canada Day Pancake Breakfast July 8 - 10 - Community Campout Enchant Park Donations: • $2000 to Slave Lake Disaster Relief * * * * *!+(»• W CANADA DAY • Please join us for breakfast at the Milo Hall. Admission is a donation to the food bank. CANADA DAY PANCAKE BREAKFAST July 1 8:00 - 10:00 am LIONS COMMUNITY CAMPOUT July 8-10 • Everyone is welcome to join us again at Enchant Part. Enjoy swimming, golf, and kids games. Breakfast is served by our club on Saturday and Sunday mornings. ANNUAL LIONS BARBECUE Sunday, August 14 1:30 p.m. May Crossword Solution8 Funny Father’s Day Jokes for Dad The Right Choice My 16-year-old brother, Ryan, was out late with friends one night. Suddenly he realized it was Father’s Day and he had neglected to buy a card for our dad. After much searching, Ryan located an open store, but was disappointed to find only two cards left on a picked-over rack. Selecting one, he brought it home and, somewhat sheepishly, presented it to our father. Upon opening it, Dad read this message: “You’ve been like a father to me.” He looked at Ryan, puzzled. “Well, Dad,” Ryan tried to explain, “it was either that or the card that said, ‘Now that I’m a father too!”’ Thanks for the Soda, Pop! Before I took the old family car to college, my father loaded the trunk with soft-drink bottles filled with oil, coolant and transmission fluid. Sure enough, my car overheated. Scolding myself for not listening to my father’s instructions, I looked at the engine and saw how well he knew me. The oil cap was labeled Dr Pepper, the transmission stick, Coke, and the empty coolant container, Diet Pepsi. I finished the trip safely. Say What, Dad? Our Gen-X daughter, Cristie, made my husband a Father’s Day card entitled “Things My Dad Would Never Say.” Such as: • “Can you turn up that music?” » “Go ahead and take my truck. Here’s 50 bucks for gas.” • “I LOVE your tattoo. We should both get new ones.” • “Here, you take the remote.” What a Card! Father’s Day was near when I brought my three-year-old son, Tyler, to the card store. Inside, I showed him the cards for dads and told him to pick one. When I looked back, Tyler was picking up one card after another, opening them up and quickly shoving them back into slots, every which way. “Tyler, what are you doing?” I asked. “Haven’t you found a nice card for Daddy yet?” “No,” he replied. “I’m looking for one with money in it.” UAPPY FATlLP'5 DAY Papa Bear My husband’s cousin married a former Marine who now works for United Parcel Service. They bought their four-year-old son two stuffed bears — one in a UPS uniform and the other in Marine garb. When the boy seemed confused, his father brought out a picture of himself in full Marine dress. “See, Connor?” he explained, pointing to the photo and then to the bear. “That’s Daddy.” Connor’s eyes went from one to the other, and then he asked in a puzzled voice, “You used to be a bear?” Pop Vs. Pup While flying from Denver to Kansas City, Kansas, my mother was sitting across the aisle from a woman and her eight- year-old son. Mom couldn’t help laughing as they neared their destination and she heard the mother say to the boy, “Now remember — run to Dad first, then the dog.” Paternal Payback On the day I received my learner’s permit, my father agreed to take me out for a driving lesson. With a big grin, he hopped in behind the driver’s seat. “Why aren’t you sitting up front on the passenger’s side?” I asked. “Kirsten, I’ve been waiting for this ever since you were a little girl,” Dad replied. “Now it’s my turn to sit back here and kick the seat.” No. 1 on Our List — Literally! My father was completely lost in the kitchen and never ate unless someone prepared a meal for him. When Mother was ill, however, he volunteered to go to the supermarket for her. She sent him off with a carefully numbered list of seven items. Dad returned shortly, very proud of himself, and proceeded to unpack the grocery bags. He had one bag of sugar, two dozen eggs, three hams, four boxes of detergent, five boxes of crackers, six eggplants, and seven green peppers.Oxymorons 1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks? 2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand? 3. if a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know? 4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? 5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? 6. Why do "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing? 7. Why do "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing? 8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges? 9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there? 10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting? 11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"? 12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected? 13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites? 14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things? 15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds? 16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it? 17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? 18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? 19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right? 20. Why is bra singular and panties plural? 21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead? The doctor said he needed more activity. So I hide his T.V. remote three times a week. 22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase? 23. How come abbreviated is such a long word? 24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them? 25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? 26. Why do they call it a TV "set" when you only have one? 27. Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks? 28. Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway ? I dunno, why do we?June 2011 H A J 1 _ I 4 U — — m , ivi i i u l i oretry Bill Nye’s Climate Lab http:// t*n»n»r l~»illt'nllmotA]nK Anm / This site is in­tended as an inno­vative educational initiative devel­oped and pre­sented by Chabot Space & Science Center. Chabot has partnered with Emmy-award- winning science educator Bill Nye the Climate Guy and world-class science advisors to inspire kids and families to reduce energy consump­tion and find solu­tions to a warming planet. The site offers fun missions and ac­tivities that in­crease climate lit­eracy and teach energy-saving strategies for many areas of daily life. A fun site that sh ds interested with a recognizable char­acter while teach­ing them some valuable informa­tion. Alberta Library Conference April 28th- Mav 1st in Jasper “Open doors, open minds, open access” Milo Library was well represented at the confer­ence this year with 2 Board members- Brenda Prentice and Christopher Northcott in attendance along with Library Man­ager Joanne Monner. Some session topics in­cluded archival databases, law library, volunteers, youth in the library, popu- N E ULS BESTSELLERS Hannah’s List by Debbie Macomber, The Shadow of Your Smile by Mary Higgins Clark, Home Free by Fern Michaels, Poor Little Bitch Girl by Jackie Collins, Hell Gate by Linda Fairstein, Caught by Harlan Coben, Family Storms by V.C. An­drews, Queen of the Night by J.A. Jance, Fever Dream by Preston & Child, Dimiter by William Peter Blatty ADULT FICTION The Sixth Man by David Baldacci, Sixkill by Robert Parker, Chasing Fire by Nora Roberts, The reluctant hero by Michael Dobbs, Ghost Ship by P.J. Aider- man, The Alpine Uproar by Mary Daheim, Room by Emma Donoghue, Olive Kit- teridge by Elizabeth Strout, lar adult books, marketing and presentations. Direc­tions libraries need to take in the future was a topic covered in several differ­ent sessions. The RISE project (our video confer­ence partnership between Chinook Arch, Marigold and Shortgrass Library Systems) have received 3 awards: Alberta Municipal Affairs Minister’s Award for Innovation in Public Library Service (presented on Friday at the confer­ence), American Library W PURCHAS Russian Winter by Daphne Kalotay, Postcard Killers by James Patterson & Liza Marklund, The Messenger by Jan Burke, Loose Ends by Tara Janzen, The Girl Who Disappeared Twice by An­drea Kane, Those in Peril by Wilbur Smith SCIENCE FICTION False Horizon by Alex Archer, Dragon Keeper by Robin Hobb ADULT WESTERN City of Bad Men by Ralph Cotton ADULT NON-FICTION If You Ask Me by Betty White, The Floor of Heaven by Howard Blum, Lemon- aid 2011/2012 Used Cars and Trucks by Phil Edmon- ston Association’s Presidential Citation for Innovative Library Projects (to be presented in New Orleans) and Computerworld Hon­ors Laureate (to be pre­sented in Washington DC). We are fortunate to be part of this project. E S DVD’s King’s Speech, Tangled, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows, Chronicles of Narnia the Voyage of the Dawn Treader PICTURE BOOKS Roscoe and the Pelican Res­cue by Lynn Rowe Reed, What If? by Laura Vaccaro Seeger, The Very> Itchy Bear by Nick Bland, The Beren- stain Bears' Big Bedtime Book, Give Me Back My Dad by Robert Munsch , Beach by Elisha Cooper EASY READER Collection ofStorytime Fa­voritesJ HOURS FOR 2 0 11 Tuesday: 10:00 am — 5:00 pm Tuesday evening: 7:00 pm — 9:00 pm Thurs & Fri: 10:00 am — 5:00 pm Phone or Fax [phone] Email messages to [e-mail] or check out our website @ www.milolibrarv.ca Joanne Monner, librarian Barb Godkin assistant librarian Tracy Mozill assistant librarian \ BORROW A POWER MONITOR! Want to know your power usage? You can now borrow a power monitor from our library. FortisAlberta has donated power monitors to all libraries in the Chinook Arch Regional Library System for patrons to check out. When plugged into an appliance, the monitors dis­play the appliance's energy consumption and the cost of running that appliance based on your cur­rent electricity rate. The monitors aiso project energy cost for a given time period - anywhere from one day to one year. You can borrow a power monitor for up to one week. If the monitor at your library is already signed-out, you can place a hold on a monitor at any library in the system through your library's online catalogue or at www.milolibrary.ca . energy FORT IS in m/'aw ALBERTA YUUTt Wcty Continued from p a g e 1 JUNIOR FICTION Bongo Fishing by Thacher Hurd, Glitter Girls and the Great Fake Out by Meg Cabot, Ms. Leakey is Freaky by Dan Gutman, Science Fair by Dave Barry & Ridley Pearson, Amelie the Seal Fairy, Pia the Penguin Fairy, Tess the Sea Turtle Fairy, Courtney the Clownfish Fairy, Stephanie the Starfish Fairy, Whitney the Whale Fairy & Ally the Dophin Fairy by Daisy Mead­ows JUNIOR NON-FICTION Sun and Storms by Nicole Mortillaro Summer Student Jobs We have two job openings this year. 1 .Summer Reading Program Assistant 2.Archives Project Summer Student See the two separate poster ads in this Canopener for details. DONATIONS We want to thank the fol­lowing people for their do­nations to our library this month.- Carol vooys, Jean Thomson, Kelly Nelson, Dick Berg/of, Kerry Les­lie, and Marie Robbie. We apologize to any­one who we may have missed. We appreciate each one. Don’t forget that we have several magazine subscriptions to lend out to patrons as well . Welcome back to Tracy Mozill. You certainly missed a long winter! Our next Library Board meeting is Monday, June 13th,2011 @ 7:00 pmIxrvisi] Fence Brand mam The best in Electronic Pet containment and behavioral products. Indoor and outdoor solutions for cats and dogs, electronic doors, remote trainers and bark control collars, 100% Satisfaction or money back Lifetime Warranty Contact Greg Deitz 1-877-364-2929 www.invisiblefence.ca Try out our qr code ap on your smartphone or webcam Just download the free ap and scan this codeMy. , , , th e Rev, Gordon C ra n ch The second week of May, I attended a clergy conference in Banff. The weather was beautiful and the mountain air so fresh and clean, it almost compensated for the dry and boring parts of the conference. If you remember from past writings, I am Saskatchewan born, so not a big fan of anything that blocks my vision for saypo miles in any direction. I do like to look at the mountains, but from a distance - say Vulcan. Years ago, when we went to Banff to sightsee, I always felt claustrophobic with mountains closing in on me on all four sides. I must be getting tougher as I get older, or my memories of life in Saskatchewan are dimming at last. This time I could certainly appreciate the majesty of the mountains. Close to Milo, you have some good sized hills so you can appreciate what the psalmist says, “Unto the hills around will I lift up, my longing eyes. O whence for me, shall my salvation come, from whence arise.” I suppose anything that we have to look up to see is a marvellous sight, whether it be the Buffalo Hills, the Rocky Mountains, an eagle floating on the currents. But in this case, the hills and mountains are a reminder of the Creator of the earth and all that is in it. Larger than life, a constant in an everchanging world, solid, powerful, watchful. “For the mountains may depart and the hills be removed, but my steadfast love shall not depart from you.” That is a promise that gives us hope. Even when things seem overwhelmingly dark, we are secure in the Love of God. A Bible passage that I always get a kick out of is, “For you shall go out in joy and be led back in peace; the mountains and the hills before you shall burst into song and all the trees of the fields shall clap their hands.” I just have to smile at that imagery of the singing mountains and the trees of the field clapping their hands. But I digress. The 121 Psalm goes on to tell us that God Jehovah shall preserve thy going out, thy coming in. God will watch over us all through our life, above us watching as we are born, through our growing years, to our maturity and eventually at the iast, as we make our way to be with Him throughout eternity. And He shall keep us, henceforth, yea, forevermore. This is a promise made thousands of years ago, yet it is as fresh and new as when God made the promise. See you in church! Hope Lutheran Church Milo Regular Worship Services: June 12, 9:00 am June 26, 9:00 am Reverend: Gordon CranchFrank Mclnenly Auctions Ltd Vulcan, AB Serving the Agricultu Since 1967 [phone] Frank Mcinenly Stacey Schooten CALL US FOR: - Logo design and set up - Embroidery & Screenprinting - Monograms on keepsakes (baby blankets, towels, sheets) - Pens, magnets, pins, knives, keylites, etc. Open Mon.-Fri. 9 am - 5 pm 133 Centre Street - P.O. Box 1420 Vulcan, AB TOL 2B0 [phone] Toll Free: 888-485-2462 Fax: [phone] E-mail: [e-mail] Norm Stokes Welding ^ General & Oilfield Repair s New & Used Steel Sales s Custom Built Trailers s B-Pressure Welding ||r Norm- Phone [phone] Cell 485-0365 Craig- Phone [phone] Cell 485-0288 r Wade- Cell 485-1119HOLY HUMOUR A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you ‘know' what the Bibie means? The son replied, "I do know!" "Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?" "That's easy, Daddy." the young boy replied excitedly," It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.’ There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country. "Is there anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk. "Only the Ten Commandments." answered the lady. A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter. Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses." When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation." There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets." While driving in Pennsylvania , a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign. "Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step in exhaust." A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?" A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy. "Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked. "You know - Our Father, who does art in Heaven." A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. "Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip." The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It’s the same in my business." Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about. The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt." Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the pastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about. He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming." The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play. "Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But, you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances." During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up." At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star Spangled Banner." And that is how the substitute became the regular organist!“Burt’s Point of View” Bottled Water Last month I talked about a computerized apparatus called a GPS, this month’s article, BW, (;Bottled Water) my readers will no doubt think my point of view is BS, (no explanation needed). No matter what comes on the market in this negative world of ours, somebody, or company, has to find fault. A product comes out which led people to believe is safer, purer and healthier than ordinary tap water, so what do people do, buy it. Bottled water has become very popular over tap water and there are claims it isn’t safe to drink for health reasons; for one, chemicals leached into it from the plastic containers at temperatures between -4 ° C to +3 8 ° C (our most common temperatures) can cause breast and other types of cancers. The manufacturing of bottles causes pollution; not recycling causes pollution; the oil used in the manufacturing takes away from what vehicles could use and numerous more negative reasons. Because of this, it is banned in some major U.S. cities. In some of the material I have read, bottled water quality is the same, lower or better than that of our every day tap water. Here is something I don’t believe and you probably don’t either. “A leading brand of bottled water is currently labeled “P.W.S.”, which stands for “public water source”. In Canada, bottled water is regulated as a food; therefore it must comply with the Food and Drug Act, to meet microbiological standards. If manufacturing process has to meet Canada's requirements for safety and quality, why isn’t it safe to drink? Sure, I agree with some of the negative claims that I mentioned earlier. For one, chemicals from the plastic bottles can leach into the water, but how many bottles does it take to do any harm. Never have I heard of anybody being hospitalized, or getting sick because of that. Another misconception, litre for litre, compared to gasoline, there isn’t much difference in price, to me, that is a ridiculouscomparison. No way will our vehicles use the same amount of gasoline as our body uses water. (Unfortunately). Ninety percent or more of the cost the consumer pays for bottled water goes to necessities other than water itself; such as bottle manufacturing, shipping, market retailing, other expenses and can’t forget about a profit margin. In short, tap water is a small percentage of the cost of bottled water So what, if people prefer bottled water because of it’s convenience, health reasons or whatever, what’s the big deal? In my point of view, what about: 1 - tax revenue from the production and sales, 2- the vast amount of jobs created, 3- convenience for bikers, hikers, office workers etc. 4- revenue and exercise for those who rely on bottle collection, 5- availability for communities where the water is contaminated. Sure, take it off the market and you will hear numerous positive comments. As long as you have tap water, you can have an infinite amount of pure, clean, fresh water in your home when it is treated. It is more likely most bottled water actually contain higher concentrations of bacteria and parasites than regular tap water. When you use the large bottle, you may inadvertently be contaminating your cooler with bacteria from the bottles or be drinking water from a cooler not sanitized often enough. tap water is, on average, IDO times cheaper than bottled water.* boycott the bottle. Who do you believe? What is the right thing to do? --- ~-—■ --- The bottom line, both tap water and bottled water may contain contaminants and may not be healthy for long-term consumption. But don't worry, there is a simple alternative; using a home drinking water filter is a healthier choice, more economical, environmentally friendly, convenient, saves you money and gives you piece of mind. Even though, more and more Canadians are buying their water at the store. Now that I have worked up a thirst, think I’ll have a cool refreshing drink of bottled water. “So There!” “And that was my Point of View”IT CAN BE HARD KEEPING A STRAIGHT FACE AS A COURT REPORTER These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place. ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning? WITNESS: He said, ’Where am I, Cathy?' ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? WITNESS: My name is Susan! ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact? WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo? WITNESS: We both do. ATTORNEY: Voodoo? WITNESS: We do. ATTORNEY: You do? WITNESS: Yes, voodoo. WITNESS: Are you kidding me? ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Duh, do 1 have to answer that question? ATTORNEY: WITNESS: ATTORNEY: WITNESS: ATTORNEY: WITNESS: She had three children, right? Yes. How many were boys? None. Were there any girls? Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Take a guess! ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male. ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year- old, how old is he? WITNESS: He's 20, much like your IQ. ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. ATTORNEY: All your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral.To be young again ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished. ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question? And last: "Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old man. "You always feel like you have to pee and most of the time you stand there and nothing comes out." "Ah, that's nothin," said the 70- year-old. "When you're seventy, you don't have a bowel movement any more. You take laxatives, eat bran, sit on the toilet all day and nothin' comes out!" "Actually," said the 80-year -old, "Eighty is the worst age of all." "Do you have trouble peeing, too?" asked the 60-year old. ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in ajar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law. "No, I pee every morning at 6:00. I pee like a racehorse on a flat track; no problem at all" "So, do you have a problem with your bowel movement?" "No, I have one every morning at 6:30." Exasperated, the 60-year-old said, "You pee every morning at 6:00 and a BM every morning at 6:30. So what's so bad about being 80?" "I don't wake up until 7:00."G D.’s REPAIR '4 Licensed Automotive Technician Friendly Reliable Service •=#■ Maintenance & Repairs -¥ ALL your Mechanical needs Call Gerald Deitz: 599-2354 Or 599-2464 Here is a brainteaser I’m sure some will enjoy, the solution will be in next month’s issue. CRYPTO-QUOTE Each crypto-quote puzzle uses a different code to disguise a quote by someone famous. Can you break the codes to reveal the words of wisdom and their authors? Qnb acbeqbhq jfbehrcb kz fkdb khoykzaineqjbyjfb heu uyr tezzyq oy. “H y Q n b c b !!” LAST MONTH: INSANITY IS HEREDITARY; MOTHERS GET IT FROM THEIR CHILDREN. —SAM LEVENSONSCOTIA BANK MILO IS LOOKING FOR SOMEONE TO DO WEEKLY YARD MAINTENANCE PLEASE CONTACT WENDY @ [phone] CELESTIAL WELLNESS SWEDISH RELAXATION MASSAGE REFLEXOLOGY and/or REIKI BARB FISCHER, RMT HIDDEN VALLEY GOLF COURSE 322 Antelope Street Telephone: [phone] Email: celestialwellness(g)telus.net Website: www.celestialwellness.ca Experience the healing power of Swedish Massage, Reflexology or Reiki! Each restores and maintains energy, reduces stress/tension, improves circulation and assists the body to become calm, balanced and healed. Enjoy a balancing effect on your mental, emotional and spiritual bodies.10 NEAT THINGS ABOUT RAIN 1. Raining cats and dogs. We usually expect water from rain, but other things have been known to fall from the sky in the guise of rain. Most recently it was birds, dead birds in Beebe, Arkansas this past News Year's Eve, and again just a few days later in Louisiana. This is not that unusual. It has rained jellyfish in England, spiders in Argentina and worms in Louisiana. In 2005 it rained frogs in Serbia. One theory is that strong winds traveling over water can pick fish or frogs, and carry them several miles before dropping them, but this doesn't explain the worms. 2. Acid rain. There are worse things than cats, dogs and frogs falling from the sky. Acid rain is rain that has been contaminated with chemicals from industrial or automobile emissions. Sunlight neutralizes some of these chemicals, but others fall to earth and can get back into the water system. Much of the acid rain comes from mining smelters and coal-fired generators, killing fish and bacteria and upsetting natural balance - for example, on your car, acid rain causes windshield smearing, obscuring vision, which causes accidents. It can be removed with abrasives and chemicals; some people use a very fine grain steel wool. 3. Disappearing rain . Rain that falls from the sky but evaporates before it can reach the earth is called virga. A large cloud droplet can measure more than 5 mm in diameter and might drop at about nine metres per second, picking up velocity as it nears the earth, due to gravity. (A human body drops at about 125 miles per hour.) A very small raindrop might fall about two metres per second. Don't quote this. There are a lot of variables. If the grass is dry at sunrise, it will probably rain. Red Sky in morning, sailors take warning. 6. Are we running out of water? The balance of water on earth remains fairly constant over time. Water simply moves from one place to another and often in one fonn or another: from river to ocean, from ocean to atmosphere, through evaporation, condensation, precipitation, infiltration, runoff and subsurface flow and it does so in different phases: liquid, solid or gas. In its various movements and stages, water is purified, replenishing fresh water supplies around the earth and, in so doing, redistributing minerals. 7. Water storage. About 95% of the earth's water supply is stored in oceans, which supply about 90% of the water that enters the water cycle through evaporation. The world's largest man made cistern is in Yerebatan Sarayi in Turkey. It was built in 527 AD and can hold 80,000 cubic metres of water in underground vaults. 8. Rainmakers. Cloud seeding with dry ice or silver iodide and even salt has been tried to varying degrees of success. However, today's rainmakers encounter about as much skepticism as did the rainmakers of old, who were shown to be charlatans. The effectiveness of cloud seeding is much in doubt. (The only real way to guarantee rain is to wash your car.) 4. The Urban Heat Island effect. If you farm or garden on the downwind side of a large city, you are probably getting more rain than your neighbours on the windward side. The UHI effect may also increase the length of your growing season. Conversely, you are probably suffering poorer air quality by being on the receiving end of pollutants such as ozone. 5. Rain Myths and maybes. When the cows lie down, rain is coming. Flowers of the morning glory close when rain is due. Rain on your wedding day guarantees good luck and a happy marriage. Oak and maple leaves tend to curl up preceding a rain and pine cone seeds remain closed. Cats clean behind their ears before a rain. 9. Rain and driving. Don't use speed control in the rain. If you hydroplane, your car could actually accelerate and what little control you might have is lost. If the roads have been hot and dry the first few hours of a rain can be the slickest as engine oil and grease may have built up and will interact with the water droplets. 10. Dirty rain. Every raindrop holds a grain of dust around which the water can condense. Even the cleanest rain contains about 1,000 dust particles per cubic metre of air. This adds credence to the "Red sky in morning" rain myth in that the red sky denotes a fair amount of dust in the atmosphere.fe Help Wanted The Village of Milo is-taking applications for the STEP (summer temporary employment program) position available beginning May 2008. Employment can commence later, but at a minimum, applicants will be required to work through July and August (8 weeks). This will be mainly an outdoors position. Applicant job duties will focus on cleaning, maintenance and upkeep of Village property, garbage collection and other duties as required. Status as a "student" is not required to appiy to this position. (Minimum age requirement is 14 years. Wage- $10.00 / hour plus 4% vacation pay Please Contact the Village Office at [phone] for more information, or drop off letter of application briefly stating qualifications with 2 references during regular Office Hours. Snake Valley Drop-In News Health Nurse & Foot Care Wednesday, June 8, 1:00-2:30 PM Crib Nights Done until the Fall. Cards & Games Tuesdays & Fridays 1:30 PM All Adults are Welcome! Don’t forget to stop in for coffee on Mondays. THE COUNTRY FARMHOUSE Gifts, Antiques and Collectibles With A Taste of Rural Alberta Monday to Friday -11:00 am to 5:00 pm Saturday -11:00 am to 4:00 pm Reservations for evening meals are welcome! Book for parties, anniversaries or special events. Box 10 from Cluny Hilltop Dianne Brown Cluny, AB 3 miles west Ph. 403-734-2593 T0J 0S0 % mile north Fax [phone]Meadowlark Senior Care Homes - a private government licensed residential care home located in the Town . We pro vie lour supervision, meals and customized personal care and assistance with actives of daily living. If you are in the position of requiring a safe, healthy and happy environment for a loved one, or know of someone that would benefit from such a service call: 403-934-5294 Space is limited Familiar Troubles . Which do you want to overcome? z Cooking meals for one person z Living alone and not safe Z Needing help with personal care z Forgetting to take medications •/ I QriNw nhli^hhv Meadowlark Care Home provides a healthy, safe & caring home-like environment. We are here to help! Community & Business Comments “Deb’s home & clients have always been a wonderful addition to our community” Dr. S. Burke “I have lived in this town for more than thirty years and I have always considered this business to be a valuable addition to our community” M. Flebotte -Business Owner “I would like to comment that I have received no calls or complaints about this business in my 4 !4> years as Councilor for Division 2 Wheatland County” K. Sauve Grandmother Wanted For living the best years of her life at Meadowlark Senior Care Home You can be reassured knowing: • Not living alone but safe with 24 hour trained support staff • Eating healthy home-cooked meals & snacks • Receiving customized assistance with personal care & daily activities • Taking medications Your Reward Priceless!!! Call: 403-934-5294 Govt. Licensed & ASCHA member Meodbwfcirfi is TvUStecC. ."We would never consider a Long-term facility for our mother, she would have hated it. A smaller residential care home like Meadowlark is just right for ALL her needs.” Cameron Family “A very special thank you to Debbie Wakelam for her kindheartedness, her compassion and the excellent care she gave Mom during the time she resided at the Care Home.” Snndmiller Familu members OUR REPUTATION is what clearly sets us apart from the others. It has been won amongst families and medical professionals by concentrating on little details that can make a senior's day a good one. What Residents Have to Say “Thank you so much for taking such good care of me. “ M.Gregory “I like it here and not much more to say than that.” G. Vooys “Oh, a cup of hot tea, nothing I like better and Debbie always gets it for me” E. McGillis “I like the people and the good food. Being here is just fine and dandy” l. Bishop “I like helping set the table, fold clothes and watering the flowers. 1 like watching the birds” B. Hare “It can’t be any better” M. Zachery Housing and Care Services Level 1 When living in your own home is no longer the safe or right option we provide meals, laundry, housekeeping fit 24 hr support. Level 2 Is geared for residents who require assistance with grooming, dressing, toileting, and medication supervision in addition to all of the above services. Level 3 Care needs require a higher level of support. As well as assistance with eating, special diets, and bowel & bladder care in addition to all of the above services. Level 4 Total Assistance includes all of the above services. You Do Not Need to Make the same Mistake That Many Make Are you struggling with aging parents and illness? What happens when your aging parents need to move and won’t? How do you balance your parent’s independence with their safety? 1. Educate yourself about the services and choices available 2. Talk to people and ask questions. 3. Become more specific in your requirements 4. Visit several options - slow down, take a look around and ask yourself: Z Do I like this place? Z Would I want to live here? Z Would Mom think it is clean enough? Z Does it feel like HOME? 5. DO NOT WAIT TOO LONG - you will never be guaranteed a happy ending. Much better to be ahead of the game then behind the eight ball! Over the years, family members, residents, neighbors and business associates alike have praised Meadowlark Senior Care Homes for the exceptional care shown to all residents. "We know how to deliver care in a way that promotes independence & keeps the dignity of our residents. CALL NOW 403-934-5294Casual Help Wanted The Village of Milo is looking for community individuals interested in training to provide Casual Back Up and Relief for the Milo Post Office Clerk. The Village will provide compensation for training. /Applicant job duties will focus on receiving, sorting and distribution of mail and providing positive customer service. As some Back Up may be required with little notice, applicants must have scheduling flexibility to accommodate this. Ideally, there will be more than one person trained in this capacity, and successful candidates will rotate in turns filling in for the Post Office Clerk. Minimum age requirement is 18 years. Wage: $12.00 / hour Please Contact the Village Office at [phone] for more information, or drop off letter of application briefly stating qualifications and 2 references. Arrowwood Cooperative Association P.0. Box 120-17 Centre Street Arrowwood, AB TOL 0B0 Bulk Petroleum, Cardlock or Hardware Sales 403-534-3803 Tire shop Sales 403-534-3804 OilPARTS & SERVICE TO ALL MAKES AND MODELS HOT TUB SPRING TUNE UP SPECIAL $249.95 REG $499.95 INCLUDES ALL NEW SEALS, BEARINGS, O-RINGS, CONTACTORS, UPDATING MICROPROCESSOR, COVER CONDITIONING, PIPE FLUSH AND FILTER (MOST SPAS) ADD $100.00 FOR DRAIN, CLEAN AND FILL Shane Gregoire Certified Factory Trained Master Technician with over 20 years experience 403-599-0009 No Bull Pricing & Warranty No call out fee within 30km’s of MiloMilo Library Student Temporary Employment Program Milo Library Summer Reading Program Assistant at Milo Library Duties: -help plan the children's summer reading activities (the theme this year is 'Splash! celebrate summer”) -conduct children's activities that may include reading stories, playing games, crafts and science activities -help with general library duties when children are not at the library Hours and wages: -30 hours per week for 8 weeks -Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday during July and August -ll:00am-5:00 pm and 7:00-9:00pm Tues -10:00am-5:00 pm Wed-Thurs -10:00am-2:00 pm Fri-Sat -Wage $10.40/hr Requirements: -Minimum age - 16 years old (or will turn 16 this year) To apply: -drop off resume by June 9th, 2011 -be sure to indicate any special interests or experience that you have had in working with children, crafts, science or any other area that might be valuable in this job.HELP WANTED Archives Summer Student ARCHIVES Duties: • scanning local historical materials to digital files for preservation and sharing ® initial cataloguing of what is available in the library archives Hours and wages: • 30 hours per week for 8 weeks in July & August, 2011 • Wage: $12.00 to $15.00/hr, depending on skills and experience • Days of work: preferably Tuesday through Friday, 10:00 am - 5:00 pm, plus some additional hours to be worked out with the successful applicant. Requirements: • Minimum age - 18 years old (or will turn 18 this year) • Ability to learn and work independently • Skilled with computer hardware and software To apply: • drop off resume at Milo Library by June 10th, 2011 or email to [e-mail] • be sure to indicate in your resume or cover letter any special skills, interests or experience that you have had in local history, museums or libraries, and computer skills (examples: working with scanners, computer programs such as Excel) A Milo Lions Archivist Fellowship Project at Milo Library♦ Year bnd Celebration at the * Milo Community School Tuesday, June 28th 12:00—1:30 Lunc